There comes a time when you and or someone else needs to be read the Riot Act. The Riot Act is confronting an absolute ultimate reality and truth that you or someone else has been denying and putting off for a certain period of time. The Riot Act is read to you out of love and concern for your joy and happiness. It is a complete and totally honest confrontation that holds nothing back. But it's important to be ready for it. The Riot Act could be about a job, relationship, lifestyle, or marriage. Perhaps you know someone who has been living in a situation that is somewhat rewarding and not so rewarding. They’ve been in it way too long and everyone else has been noticing that there's something wrong with that situation and relationship.
Let's Get Personal ... What if it's YOU who Needs a Riot Act?
The Riot Act calls for reality and its theme is to address trouble, misery and unhappiness. Perhaps you are aware that you are not living to your full potential for joy, bliss, ecstasy, happiness and creativity. What and who are holding you back? It’s probably you who is holding you back. You are responsible for your choices and your mistakes. Is it time to make a change? Are you getting sucked back into a situation that has all kinds of negatives associated with it?
Your full potential is a reality. If you are not living your life to your full potential, how are you holding yourself back? What kind of thinking are you engaging in? Somebody has to read you the Riot Act. Somebody has to tell you what the absolute complete truth to your situation is. You need to be aware of your choices and how you are getting sucked back into old patterns and old ways of relating that are not rewarding and leave you miserable and unhappy.
Intimacy is a dance. It’s like a cha-cha ... one step forward, two steps back, two steps forward, etc. Maybe at some point you can reach a place where you can make the absolute right decision to help you move forward with your life. Is it time to make a change? Are you ready to put behind you what has to be put behind you and take the next step forward?
The 'What" and the "How"
There are no perfect decisions. There is always the “What” and the “How”. You can’t get to the “How” until you spend the time going deep inside yourself and constantly asking “What” has been holding you back. Deep self-exploration will give you the answers that you are seeking, if you ask the right questions. Keep asking “What“ and eventually the “How” will come to you. You are responsible for your happiness. Working on yourself can be and should be your first priority. Stop trying to change someone else if they don’t want to change.
Change Starts with YOU
Change starts with you. There comes a time when you have to separate yourself out from the negative situation that you are locked into. The Riot Act will get you to make the statements and the moves that you have to make. The Riot Act tells you precisely what you can and should be doing. It does not hem and haw. It is intended to set you free and unhook you from your thinking and the script that you have been writing and saying to yourself. It doesn’t pull any punches. It doesn’t give you or leave you any room to wiggle and squiggle back into your old status quo. It pulls you out of your stuck place and tells you like it is. It insists that you make the right decisions and immediately release yourself from the stage that you are locked into.
Resisting Change or Making Changes?
It is always natural to resist change and justify returning to your old way of thinking and doing things. The Riot Act understands this and waits until you are ready to make the changes that have to be made. It understands how you try to maintain and keep the status quo. You are full of contradictions. There are always rewarding explanations to try to get you back and locked into your old way of being. But there is the question - can you do better? Can you lead a more rewarding and happy life? If the answer is “Yes” now is the time to move. Take your two arms and symbolically and physically act as if you are putting your present life behind you and allow your body and your mind to move into the next stage of your life. Ask yourself this question, “Aren’t you tired of all this crap?“ Cut the cord and move into the unknown ... the uncertainty. You can always do better. Anything is possible. They are infinite possibilities in the universe. Only your archaic thinking can pull you back and put you into the emotional and psychological prison that surrounds your life in the here and now. Time to move baby. Move!
The Power of the Riot Act
The Riot Act has power. It can move continents and stars. It can certainly move you out of the dilemma that you are locked into it. Here it comes ... so, look out. The Riot Act has its eyes focused on you and the change that you are about to absolutely make without any hesitation.
A Word of Caution
Other people/persons, organizations will always try to maneuver and convince you that they are making changes. The parties involved may even apologize. Apologies without real change do not amount to much.
To Change or Not to Change: Your Choice
In order for change to take place, a significant party/person must actually understand the situation and be willing to make the correct changes. If they are stuck in defensiveness and resistances, then the situation maintains the status quo and goes nowhere. The Riot Act must be put into full service. Somebody has got to move. It may be and better be you. In order to cure this situation, it is absolutely necessary that you or the significant party works on themselves diligently and searches deep within themselves. The answers will come and movement will take place. It may even take place quicker and faster than anticipated. Go with the flow. Trust the real universe and the deep universe within yourself. Work on yourself and watch things change. This . is . the . Riot Act.
Paul J. Hannig, Ph.D. LMFT